Relationship Combatibility Factors
Relationship and Marriage counseling can assist you find out how suitable you are.
The two most crucial factors that determine how compatible you are as a couple are:
A similar level of psychological vitality and maturity and a similar ranking of Instinctual Variants.
What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the natural energies or drive that are inherently part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.
Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual type are often with the basic survival needs as they translate into our contemporary society, for example, finance, food, accomodation, health, physical safety and comfort.
Being secure and physically comfortable are essential, and they will often bring these supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice bad lighting, uncomfortable chairs, the room temperature, when the lunch break will be, and whether they will enjoy the food provided. They tend also to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of basic necessities of life.
They are the most introverted of the types.
Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this type have a intense desire for severity of experience and intimacy. The forthright riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a room they gravitate toward people they feel attracted to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can turn into intimacy junkies, often ignoring pressing matters or even basic hygiene if they are swept up in something that has captivated them. This gives a expansive exploratory philosophy to life, but can also give a lack of focus on one’s own achievements.
Social Instinct.
People of this variation are focused on their interactions with others and with the sense of value and self esteem they derive from their participation in collective activities. These include work, family, hobbies and clubs.
On entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the relationships and subtle politics between the different people and social circles. They are subconsciously focused on other people’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to interact with others to feel safe, alive and energised. They seem to enjoy interacting with people, but they avoid intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.
Within each person, one of these Instincts will predominate. In fact these 3 instincts can be ranked like the layers of a cake, with the most predominant one at the top. The weakest one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These inherent instincts play an essential role in our relationships because people of the same variant tend to share values to understand each other completely, and therefore feel very compatible.
In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.
For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.
For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.